I'm 35 now and I've decided that the blog will contain no more moans. It sort of helps unwinding by posting moans but when I come to have a quick reflect over things at later dates, I realise what a miserable bastard I am and posting moans doesn't really make it better. What does make it better is calling it a night and starting afresh the next day, then if I feel I need to moan still, I may post somewhere else under a random name. Usually in the morning I realise that it's generally my fault or that I could have done something about it. Certainly the last major loss in my cash game was easily avoidable, but I was playing when tired, I shouldn't but wanted to play still. Perhaps that's a new Golden Rule - when tired and wanting to play, limit myself to $1 sng's or omaha cash.

I'm also realising that my cash game is either very bad or I do play too much when tired. I started my blonde roll on $85, made it up to $360, down again, up again and back down. Currently it's on just $130 so it's not in good shape, but I think I have to take a break from cash games before doing something radical like playing the nittiest of nits on a full ring NL100 with half a buy in or something. I can and never will play the micro stakes with any consistency so there's no point me saying that I'll grind it up from the lowest limits.

I'm also going to concentrate more on mtt's as I much prefer them. Tonight's been reasonable for me having made a final table on Laddies in the $20 $2.75k gtd for $150ish and made the money in the cheapy $4 deepstack. I'm also running fairly good , 6 from 13, in the $8.80 Stars omaha comp. I'm on the brink of making two final tables in the same night for the first time ever! MTT's are also the only game where I've ever made significant increases in my bankroll so I'm clearly meant to be playing them.

Summary - 2 Golden Rules

1. No more playing cash when tired
2. Concentrate on mtt's

Update: Finished 5th - exit hand It's a shame but still a decent result and another $110 in the account. Nice evenings work overall

I'm continuing to run sick bad at the moment, but the saving grace is that with playing 6 tables, I'm sort of making elsewhere to compensate for the bad luck. During the week, I had this hand where I classically lost a bit. I thought slow playing the nuts was the way to go on the flop, but obviously the Poker Gods had they're eyes on me and made sure that it was a mistake. Thankfully the other tables held me up over the session, but I didn't once get lucky against someone else, all the hands I won I was favourite to win.

Tonight just was back to usual. I lost one lot with QQ against JJ, another with QQ against KK, another lot with QT where I flopped a straight, but obv you can't be folding flush draws so I lost to that and generally it's been another bad time.

On the plus side, I'm just about to make the money in a FT $10 knockout comp where I've picked up 3 bounties so far for a whopping $6 and I did win a sat on Stars for $55 so it's not all bad.

Oh and it's my birthday. One time please FT, one time.

As I suspected!

Problem identified and hopefully sorted. I've been playing to aggressive, most of my big losses are coming where I'm betting the arse out of each hand and being called all the way to the river. Anyway, I've realised this and played more passive tonight. I also decided that 6 tables is FTW and squeezed an easy 565 hands in and made a profit for the first time in ages. Not a huge figure at only $60, but it's better than a) A kick in the arse b) every other night this month and c) it's still a respectable 11.64 ptbb/100 (and if I tick the box on PT's preferences page, it's a whopping 23.29!)

Biggest lost pot tonight was only a net loss of $3.12 and the biggest win just over $30.

Not pioneering stuff, but hopefully back on track. Also liking 6 tables as it helps me concentrate on things more - I don't have time to surf the net at the same time

After a winning a couple of pots last night, I'm feeling more upbeat and I think I need to review my PT stats for the last few days. I have a feeling that there's a theme relating all my big losses but need to go through things to check.

I've become so demoralised with cash games at the moment and have been on the end of some rough draws recently. I'm sure it's only the standard variance that people go through, but for me, it's beyond that and it's genuinely getting me down a bit. It's not particularly the money, although blowing half my hard grinded blonde roll doesn't help, it's all the losses and unbelievable bad luck I'm going through that's really taking it's toll. Last night I managed to grind out just under 700 hands and made a net loss of $50 and had I have played like a fool I wouldn't mind, but people are calling my raises with crap and hitting big time and I'm not putting them on the hand they have because I don't expect 8 4 off suit to be calling 4xBB preflop. The graph attached shows my bad run of luck.



Anyway, it's not a complete doom and gloom thread, my tournament game seems to be going ok and I've made a few smallish cashes recently (obv I've lost all the money playing cash) and as soon as I can get my good hands to hold, I'm hoping for a nice cash.

Despite having a few major shockers during April, I still managed to grind my way to $87 profit for the month. I know it's not great, but it's better than a loss and I did ok playing multis with winning about $300 in W$, the £200 I won live and a few other bits a bobs. I'm not rich, but it's paying for my week off next week in Somerset.

Also only managed 5124 hands in April. The goal was 10k, but I suffered from something during the middle and ignored cash games for a couple of weeks. I'm off the tilt wagon now and back to grinding again for a bit, although I have to admit, I'm leaning towards mtt's again.

The guys at Chegzer have let me join their team for the APAT team challenge in Blackpool in July so that's going to be a great weekend and after my week in Somerset, it's off to DTD for the blonde bash. Some good poker coming up!

Here's a graph


Also, why is it when one of the $10 idiots joins your table, you have AQ and raise it up, he obv shoves from the BB but you know you ahead so call, he shows A6 but the flop comes x66? Why does that always happen?